+ ~ -
 
Please report pronunciation problems here. Select and sample other voices. Options Pause Play
 
Report an Error
Go!
 
Go!
 
TOC
 

beyond their own district, had, from time to
time, drawn awkward comparisons of causes
and effects, and could not help thinking that
the boys under masters from the Training
Society were cleaner, sharper, and healthier.
Kind-hearted ladies, who could not bear "to
see the poor boys knocked about so," kept
away from the place, and, in disgust,
transferred their subscriptions to non-flogging
charities. Of course there were plenty of
supporters of the old system, and, curiously
enough,even among the parents of the children.

From all discipline to no discipline is as
easy a change as many other contrarieties
produce. The school was in a state of anarchy,
and the parish was, as far as the election of a
master was concerned, in nearly the same
condition. The candidates were numerous, and
possessed just that sort of divided interest
among the trustees and subscribers, which is
wont to make even the smallest contests
doubtful and interesting.

A large quantity of popular sympathy ran
in favour of the deputy who had officiated
during the illness of the late master. Mr.
Tittleton was a fair-faced, small-eyed,
smallpox-pitted individual, whose countenance
consisted of one perpetual simper, only varied
by an occasional dash of deferential gravity.
He had a genuine horror of theatres and hard
wordsthings which appeared to form, in his
mind, only the component parts of one grand
dislike to everything not recommended in the
"Weekly Young Man's Consolation." He
dressed in black, and occasionally sported a
white neckerchief. Mystery hung over his
birth and early fortune; but little Mrs.
Pincushion, who generally knew more than people
either thought or desired, declared that she
remembered Mr. Tittleton in connection with
a yard measure, at Tape, Stiffening, and Co's.,
Oxford Street, London, and spoke of him as "a
very civil young man"—a compliment which,
by the way, did Mr. Tittleton no small harm
in the course of his canvass for the situation
of schoolmaster.

Mr. Tittleton's system of discipline was
the very reverse of that of his predecessor. It
was, in fact, little else than a continued series
of street music and gymnastics. If the school
were in an uproar a condition which, except
the vicar or curate were present, it seldom
failed to present he whistled, and the rioters
whistled in reply, and the school was quiet
till the next confusion began. If a visitor
made his appearance, a whistle accompanied
by comparative silence, welcomed the new
comer, and enabled him to ask, perhaps, four
questions and receive the answers without
feeling doubtful of the connection of his mental
faculties. Then again, when the boys went
to church, they marched as if they were
drilled: when they entered the gallery they
stood up, and knelt to the opening prayer,
and rose again to the psalrns, all with a series
of military salutes, facings about, and " to
order." In fact, one or two people began to
suspect that the attainments of the deputy master
were limited to whistling and posture-making.
A few awkward mistakes in spelling,
and in synyax, which appeared in a memorial
soliciting tne situation, occasioned the fitness
of Mr. Tittleton for the office to appear more
and more questionabie.

But he had a staunch supporter in old
Commander Screamer, who owned half a
street and two public-houses in Broad-Bumble;
and who, having spent three parts of his life
on board a man-of-war, had an unmitigated
contempt for anything whicn was unconnected
with "hard service." He was a good old
fellow, the Commander, and never blustered
long; but, no man was ever more bigoted on
the subject of books. "He had had no education;
he never felt the want of it; he had
got on in life like few men; and he would
have none of yournonsense. Teach a boy
something that would be useful aboard ship.
Talk of our national defences. A pretty
coast guard your colleges would make! Give
him none of your popular education." The
Commander had always looked upon schools
as a lawless system of tyranny, calculated
to stunt the growth, to cripple the
intellects, and to make bad soldiers and sailors.
All his sympathies were with Woolwich and
Addiscombe; and when his nephew, Horace,
left the latter place, and took to Oxford and
classics instead of gunnery and the Punjaub,
it took all the major's good nature to prevent
that young gentleman from being left in the
world with a few small debts, and no allowance.
But we did hear that a pretty little
adopted god-daughter of the Commander's
had had something to do both with Horace's
abandonment of a military life, and with his
escape from the consequences of his disobedience.

The Commander found a new field in
Broad-Bumble school, and became so favourably
impressed with the "pipe all hands"
and "to order" system, that he began to
conceive the possibility that a school might be
made a decent sort of place, and that boys
might really learn something a little worth
knowing. Like Uncle Toby, he began to look
upon the school-house as a fortification (and
it certainly was nearly strong enough), and to
calculate the probability of rendering the boys
an efficient and well-disciplined garrison,
should the French ever invade Broad-Bumble.
Accordingly he upheld Mr. Tittleton as the
man in whom all the arts, sciences, and other
qualifications appertaining to popular education
were united.

Other patrons had their own little crotchets
as well as the tough old Commander. Mr.
Stokes, a respectable retired and retiring
chemist and druggist, who had been
perpetually in difficulties with parish boys,
because they insisted on carrying the wrong
medicines to the wrong places, was for making
writing the main feature. He was naturally
desirous that every boy of the Broad-Bumble
school should be duly qualified to read the